Two Pink Lines

A year ago today, I woke up and knew our world was about to change for the better.

A year ago today, I made an early morning run to the drug store to buy a pregnancy test.

A year ago today, I saw two pink lines.

Sweet Hudson,

A year ago today is when you became our reality. I couldn't wait to let the world in on our little secret that we had created this precious new life, that you would be ours, that we were our own little family. I couldn't wait to hold you, to know you, and to see who you would be. I felt like I was learning your little personality with every kick, I got to hold you but the rest is paused until we are together again someday.

Just like I did at this time a year ago today, I cry, but the reasons are different. Instead of expecting parents, we are bereaved parents. Instead of learning how to do life with you, we are learning how to go through life without you. A life we had done for 30 years before you but once you entered it, it is now irrevocably changed.

A year from now, I will still think of you on this day. The day we found out about you, the day you became ours.

My heart beats for you.

With love always,

Mommy